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Dazza

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HAHA!! that made me laugh out loud! and indeed it was a half ton weight, well spotted.

Andy

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zelophahad

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Some brillinant rhyming there Andy - I particularly 'died' and 'died', and 'flunky' and 'monkey'. Inspired.

Andy

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Haha. There's a lesson in there. Never write poetry whilst tired.

Andy

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So what became of our farmers, all warped and fiendish and twisted,
Well there was much work to be done, and disciples to be enlisted,
Their losses had been few, but they were losses all the same,
And so more would have to be mutated, the wildlife birds and game,

Their shaman was a man so utterly vile, that his presence scarred the soul,
And he told his minions to bring to him, a newly born deer foal,
And he placed it upon a log, and carved it with a knife,
And from its bleeding carcass, their sprang unholy life,

A head did peer from the innards, and gaze out with ghastly eyes,
And slithered from the belly, and brought with it maggots and flies,
It pawed at the earth like a babe, and cowered to its master,
He who shall remain unnamed, who was bigger stronger faster,

And so the Unnamed Man, who once knew light and piety,
Was embarking on a journey, serving a rather different diety,
But who this lord of evil was, he would not tell his brothers,
For they were pawns in a greater game, and playthings of 'The Others',

Added 01.19.2010 01:09:49:

* * *

So there were fiends about, with skin as green as limes,
And they had experienced defeat, quite a lot of times,
Our once noble farmers, now damned for all eternity,
Decided to put an end, to this oddly coloured fraternity,

'Huzzah, hurrah, and woe to them', said our nasty unnamed protagonist,
'It's time to rend the flesh and bones, of this multitudinous antagonist',
And the battle was soon over, almost as quickly as it began,
The rather funny tinted raiders, were routed to a man,

But not before a rather embarrassing display, of supreme martial incompetence,
When our beloved four-hoofed farmer beheld, a rather fiendish countenence,
It was Yu-Dan or Fishgutz, who'd ammased quite a kill tally,
Who clubbed him across the lumpy skull, and sent him all doolally,

He'd never be the same again, that four-legged once noble peasant,
He'd now have the mental capacity, of a rather braindead pheasant,
But this was fine by our unnamed man, he didn't need him to do equations,
All that he requested of him, was that he kill things and sprout mutations,

And when the battle was over, and they had eaten all the slain,
The unnamed man would wait and then, he'd sneak off in the rain,
His rendesvouz would would be risky, but he knew it could not wait,
And unbeknowst to the rest of the herd, he was sealing their measly fate,

zelophahad

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Bonkers.

The Beanbag

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I think he's sneaking off to plan a surprise birthday party

WarbossKurgan

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Andy wrote:
But not before a rather embarrassing display, of supreme martial incompetence,
When our beloved four-hoofed farmer beheld, a rather fiendish countenence,
It was Yu-Dan or Fishgutz, who'd ammased quite a kill tally,
Who clubbed him across the lumpy skull, and sent him all doolally,

Andy

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::importPlugin() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/components/com_agora/viewtopic.php on line 598

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This is getting worse as the weeks go by.

These farmers who had degenerated, into the most heinous of beasts,
Had overdone it and overindulged themselves, with too many feasts,
They had become slow and sluggish, from too much beef stroganoff,
And they were quickly butchered, by the fiends from Castle Drakenhof,

For although these undead, shared our farmers' sense of misanthropy,
One of their number did not, for he was suffering from lycanthropy,
He bounded at our farmers, with all the speed of a cheetah,
And sent them packing, to have tea with the reaper,

And that was it dear readers, our farmers they scattered,
All screaming and whining, and terribly blood spattered,
Back to their lair, in the deepest darkest wood,
And looked back fondly on the days, when they used to be good,

They began to discuss and debate, if they could ever return,
To their lives once lived, that they had so hastily decided to spurn,
'No you cant', said the man who carried no name,
'If you were ever found, you'd be put to the flame',

'Look at yourselves, you're all quite the monstrosity',
'You would never fit in, in that world of virtuosity',
'You'd be hunted like animals, and strung from the gallows',
'In that debauched world, where corruption festers and wallows',

'But if you stay with me, by the gods you will be favoured',
'And you will eat the best human flesh, that has been marinated and flavoured',
And these farmers they agreed, to abandon once more,
Their humanity and their ethics, and to go to war,

zelophahad

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Beastmen eating beef? That's a sure route to BSE...

And I think the poetry's getting better Andy! (...well, even funnier at any rate! )

Andy

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Hehe, thanks.

Since I don't have a special rule for it yet I may theme one around Mad Cow Disease. Perhaps something that involves frenzy. Any thoughts, guys?

Andy

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How's this for a rule:

Cow Tipping

Cow tipping is a favourite pastime of many children, and apparently, beastmen too. A sleeping minotaur is just too tempting a target for these tippers, and sometimes being awake won't guarantee a minotaur's safety.

Any models in the beastman warband can 'tip' the minotaur over at any time. If the warrior charges the minotaur and can pass a strength test then he has succesfully toppled the beast. One models within 2" takes an immediate strength 5 hit as the cow falls on him, and the minotaur is placed as stunned facing in that direction.

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Last edited by Andy (2010-01-24 11:21:27)

zelophahad

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That's very funny, but why would you do it?! As a way of attacking the enemy?!

Andy

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Compared to the three strength 6 attack the minotaur delivers it has zero tactical value, it's just a bit of a laugh really. It would be funny pushing it onto somebody's boss.

zelophahad

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I'd make it so the minotaur only counts as knocked down I think.

I'd had an idea for your warband's special rule too:

Mad Cow Disease
Bovine Spongiform Encepalopathy has gripped the warband due to the unwise consuption of beef stronganof and other bovine-derived foodstuffs. Before each game, roll a D6 for each model in the warband. On a roll of 1 they have contracted BSE. Roll 2D6:
2 = dead - remove the model from the warband roster
3-6 = stupid for this game only
7-11 = frenzied for this game only
12 = immune - no longer needs to test before games

Andy

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Hmm, the concept is good, but I think trying to remember the effects for each beastman may get a bit tricky. Maybe I roll for each beastman and on a 2 they die, and then for all those who didn't then it's just one dice roll for all for them, so they could all be frenzied or all be stupid?

zelophahad

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Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_import() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 97

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_import() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 97

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_import() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 97

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_import() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 97

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_import() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 97

Strict Standards: Non-static method JDispatcher::getInstance() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/application/application.php on line 501

Strict Standards: Non-static method JString::strpos() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/emailcloak.php on line 67

Strict Standards: Non-static method JString::strpos() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/emailcloak.php on line 73

Strict Standards: Non-static method JFactory::getDBO() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/loadmodule.php on line 24

Strict Standards: Non-static method JString::strpos() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/loadmodule.php on line 26

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::getPlugin() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/pagebreak.php on line 39

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_load() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 41

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRegistryFormat::getInstance() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/registry/registry.php on line 373

Strict Standards: Non-static method JFilterInput::clean() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/registry/format.php on line 45

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRequest::getBool() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/pagebreak.php on line 42

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRequest::getVar() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/environment/request.php on line 217

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRequest::_cleanVar() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/environment/request.php on line 151

Strict Standards: Non-static method JFilterInput::getInstance() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/environment/request.php on line 577

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRequest::getBool() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/pagebreak.php on line 43

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRequest::getVar() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/environment/request.php on line 217

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRequest::_cleanVar() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/environment/request.php on line 151

Strict Standards: Non-static method JFilterInput::getInstance() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/environment/request.php on line 577

Good point. Or you could do it by henchman group?

I'm not trying to push this rule on you at all Andy - it was just an idea. It's entirely up to you.

The Beanbag

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::importPlugin() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/components/com_agora/viewtopic.php on line 598

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_load() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 92

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_import() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 97

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_import() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 97

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_import() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 97

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_import() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 97

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_import() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 97

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_import() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 97

Strict Standards: Non-static method JDispatcher::getInstance() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/application/application.php on line 501

Strict Standards: Non-static method JString::strpos() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/emailcloak.php on line 67

Strict Standards: Non-static method JString::strpos() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/emailcloak.php on line 73

Strict Standards: Non-static method JFactory::getDBO() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/loadmodule.php on line 24

Strict Standards: Non-static method JString::strpos() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/loadmodule.php on line 26

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::getPlugin() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/pagebreak.php on line 39

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_load() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 41

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRegistryFormat::getInstance() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/registry/registry.php on line 373

Strict Standards: Non-static method JFilterInput::clean() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/registry/format.php on line 45

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRequest::getBool() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/pagebreak.php on line 42

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRequest::getVar() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/environment/request.php on line 217

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRequest::_cleanVar() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/environment/request.php on line 151

Strict Standards: Non-static method JFilterInput::getInstance() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/environment/request.php on line 577

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRequest::getBool() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/pagebreak.php on line 43

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRequest::getVar() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/environment/request.php on line 217

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRequest::_cleanVar() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/environment/request.php on line 151

Strict Standards: Non-static method JFilterInput::getInstance() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/environment/request.php on line 577

BSE doesn't turn cows into frenzied beasts, it makes them uncoordinated and crippled

zelophahad

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::importPlugin() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/components/com_agora/viewtopic.php on line 598

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_load() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 92

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_import() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 97

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_import() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 97

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_import() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 97

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_import() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 97

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_import() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 97

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_import() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 97

Strict Standards: Non-static method JDispatcher::getInstance() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/application/application.php on line 501

Strict Standards: Non-static method JString::strpos() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/emailcloak.php on line 67

Strict Standards: Non-static method JString::strpos() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/emailcloak.php on line 73

Strict Standards: Non-static method JFactory::getDBO() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/loadmodule.php on line 24

Strict Standards: Non-static method JString::strpos() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/loadmodule.php on line 26

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::getPlugin() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/pagebreak.php on line 39

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_load() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 41

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRegistryFormat::getInstance() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/registry/registry.php on line 373

Strict Standards: Non-static method JFilterInput::clean() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/registry/format.php on line 45

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRequest::getBool() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/pagebreak.php on line 42

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRequest::getVar() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/environment/request.php on line 217

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRequest::_cleanVar() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/environment/request.php on line 151

Strict Standards: Non-static method JFilterInput::getInstance() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/environment/request.php on line 577

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRequest::getBool() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/pagebreak.php on line 43

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRequest::getVar() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/environment/request.php on line 217

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRequest::_cleanVar() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/environment/request.php on line 151

Strict Standards: Non-static method JFilterInput::getInstance() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/environment/request.php on line 577

I wasn't trying to be scientifically accurate Adam!!

The Beanbag

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::importPlugin() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/components/com_agora/viewtopic.php on line 598

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_load() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 92

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_import() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 97

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_import() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 97

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_import() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 97

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_import() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 97

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_import() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 97

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_import() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 97

Strict Standards: Non-static method JDispatcher::getInstance() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/application/application.php on line 501

Strict Standards: Non-static method JString::strpos() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/emailcloak.php on line 67

Strict Standards: Non-static method JString::strpos() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/emailcloak.php on line 73

Strict Standards: Non-static method JFactory::getDBO() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/loadmodule.php on line 24

Strict Standards: Non-static method JString::strpos() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/loadmodule.php on line 26

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::getPlugin() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/pagebreak.php on line 39

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_load() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 41

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRegistryFormat::getInstance() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/registry/registry.php on line 373

Strict Standards: Non-static method JFilterInput::clean() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/registry/format.php on line 45

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRequest::getBool() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/pagebreak.php on line 42

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRequest::getVar() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/environment/request.php on line 217

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRequest::_cleanVar() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/environment/request.php on line 151

Strict Standards: Non-static method JFilterInput::getInstance() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/environment/request.php on line 577

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRequest::getBool() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/pagebreak.php on line 43

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRequest::getVar() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/environment/request.php on line 217

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRequest::_cleanVar() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/environment/request.php on line 151

Strict Standards: Non-static method JFilterInput::getInstance() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/environment/request.php on line 577

Then shame on you Mr Keymer

zelophahad

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::importPlugin() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/components/com_agora/viewtopic.php on line 598

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_load() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 92

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_import() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 97

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_import() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 97

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_import() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 97

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_import() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 97

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_import() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 97

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_import() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 97

Strict Standards: Non-static method JDispatcher::getInstance() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/application/application.php on line 501

Strict Standards: Non-static method JString::strpos() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/emailcloak.php on line 67

Strict Standards: Non-static method JString::strpos() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/emailcloak.php on line 73

Strict Standards: Non-static method JFactory::getDBO() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/loadmodule.php on line 24

Strict Standards: Non-static method JString::strpos() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/loadmodule.php on line 26

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::getPlugin() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/pagebreak.php on line 39

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_load() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 41

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRegistryFormat::getInstance() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/registry/registry.php on line 373

Strict Standards: Non-static method JFilterInput::clean() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/registry/format.php on line 45

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRequest::getBool() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/pagebreak.php on line 42

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRequest::getVar() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/environment/request.php on line 217

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRequest::_cleanVar() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/environment/request.php on line 151

Strict Standards: Non-static method JFilterInput::getInstance() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/environment/request.php on line 577

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRequest::getBool() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/pagebreak.php on line 43

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRequest::getVar() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/environment/request.php on line 217

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRequest::_cleanVar() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/environment/request.php on line 151

Strict Standards: Non-static method JFilterInput::getInstance() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/environment/request.php on line 577

I know, my Dad would be appaulled (he's a veterinary pathologist and good friends with the guy who originally discovered BSE!).

Andy

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::importPlugin() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/components/com_agora/viewtopic.php on line 598

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_load() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 92

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_import() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 97

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_import() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 97

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_import() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 97

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_import() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 97

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_import() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 97

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_import() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 97

Strict Standards: Non-static method JDispatcher::getInstance() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/application/application.php on line 501

Strict Standards: Non-static method JString::strpos() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/emailcloak.php on line 67

Strict Standards: Non-static method JString::strpos() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/emailcloak.php on line 73

Strict Standards: Non-static method JFactory::getDBO() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/loadmodule.php on line 24

Strict Standards: Non-static method JString::strpos() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/loadmodule.php on line 26

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::getPlugin() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/pagebreak.php on line 39

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_load() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 41

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRegistryFormat::getInstance() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/registry/registry.php on line 373

Strict Standards: Non-static method JFilterInput::clean() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/registry/format.php on line 45

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRequest::getBool() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/pagebreak.php on line 42

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRequest::getVar() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/environment/request.php on line 217

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRequest::_cleanVar() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/environment/request.php on line 151

Strict Standards: Non-static method JFilterInput::getInstance() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/environment/request.php on line 577

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRequest::getBool() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/plugins/content/pagebreak.php on line 43

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRequest::getVar() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/environment/request.php on line 217

Strict Standards: Non-static method JRequest::_cleanVar() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/environment/request.php on line 151

Strict Standards: Non-static method JFilterInput::getInstance() should not be called statically in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/environment/request.php on line 577

BSE also stands for Badass Sheep Enragement.

True story.

Andy

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::importPlugin() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/components/com_agora/viewtopic.php on line 598

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_load() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 92

Strict Standards: Non-static method JPluginHelper::_import() should not be called statically, assuming $this from incompatible context in /data04/aroberts/public_html/libraries/joomla/plugin/helper.php on line 97

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Our farmers were feeling low, after another crippling defeat,
And they had trouble being coordinated, because they had hooves instead of feet,
They were slipping and tumbling, like women in high heels,
And had all the guile, of a cluster of beached eels,

But salvation was here, in the form of a gigantic cow,
With horns as long as spears, and a chest like a ship's prow,
'What is this titan', our farmers did roar,
'Be still' said their leader, 'it's just a minotaur',

And with this monster at their helm, victory was all but assured,
For it seemed almost impossible, that this beast would be floored,
'We don't really need to do the fighting any more', their leader did opine,
'We can just stand back and watch, and cheer it on from the sideline',

Such were the unnamed man's powers, of speech and oratory,
Even the minotaur began to think, that an enemy surrender would be mandatory,
And so it started out slow, it started out easy,
For if it didn't drink blood, it would start to get queasy,

One man it went after, just a single little figure,
And anticipated a victory, because it was so much bigger,
It didn't swing out first, it had his own devilish plan,
It'd let the first strike, come from this tiny man,

But the man had his own plan, and cut off the minotaur's head,
And the beast toppled backward, irrevocably stone dead,
Our unnamed leader looked on in horror, once again he'd been defeated,
And unable to hold his temper, he shouted [expletive deleted],

Dazza

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Andy wrote:

Our unnamed leader looked on in horror, once again he'd been defeated,
And unable to hold his temper, he shouted [expletive deleted],

Haha Genius!!!

zelophahad

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ditto - I burst out laughing, shower crisps over my keyboard and got funny looks from m colleagues!

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Andy wrote:

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